Actscelerate.com Forum Index Actscelerate.com
Open Any Time -- Day or Night
 
 FAQFAQ   SearchSearch   MemberlistMemberlist   UsergroupsUsergroups   RegisterRegister 
 ProfileProfile   Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages   Log inLog in 
@actscelerate Twitter  @actscelerate Facebook  @actscelerate Google+ 

D-I-V-O-R-C-E
Goto page Previous  1, 2
 
   Actscelerate.com Forum Index -> Acts-Celerate Post new topic   Reply to topic
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Message Author
Post Bro Bob
Dave, thank you for your response and for your prayers.

I know why I am being so outward and transparent about my situation. It is because when I was your age and I saw men of faith going through this I merely recall them being totally silent while they dealt with their loss in very different ways. I have seen them marry again very quickly and I have seen them go home and close the door.

I am a little ticked off at them for not warning me and others.

That is what I am trying to do here and anyplace I am around good men who don't truly realize anything close to the fullness of blessing it is when God creates for you your Eve.

A Proverbs 31 woman is worth more than any amount of Gold or any other treasure. Never take it for granted. Not once. Not ever.

I am gifted as a watchman. Don't put me on the wall and expect that I won't tell you what I see, or sound the alarm.

You better hear me.

BB
Golf Cart Mafia Underboss
Posts: 3899
1/8/20 3:42 pm


View user's profile Send private message
Reply with quote
Post Dave Dorsey
Bro Bob wrote:
I know why I am being so outward and transparent about my situation. It is because when I was your age and I saw men of faith going through this I merely recall them being totally silent while they dealt with their loss in very different ways. I have seen them marry again very quickly and I have seen them go home and close the door.

Bro Bob, as a younger man, quite honestly at the moment with tears in my eyes, I cannot tell you how much I appreciate this. I notice it and see it and treasure it. I hear you and will continue to do so. Thank you.
Now 67% friendlier!
Posts: 13039
1/8/20 3:48 pm


View user's profile Send private message
Reply with quote
Post Cojak
Dave Dorsey wrote:
Bro Bob... for what it's worth, your extremely transparent posts about the trial you have lived since your wife's passing are convicting, inspiring, and consistently cause my thoughts to focus on our Savior.

I am so sorry this has happened. I hate that you are hurting so much. I pray for you whenever I see your posts. But I am grateful for your willingness to be so transparent on this forum. The perspective you share is sobering but the faith and trust you demonstrate are beyond inspiring.

You are and will remain in my prayers.

I may have become lazy in part of my prayer life. But many times in the past few years I have sat, stood or knelt listening to someone pray and found my self saying yes Lord, that is what I meant. Amen Lord to the pastor's prayer, etc.

I find my self reading BB's comment and then your comment DD and all I want to say is :Amen and Amen!
There are times I just love this forum! Cool
_________________
Some facts but mostly just my opinion!
jacsher@aol.com
http://shipslog-jack.blogspot.com/
01000001 01100011 01110100 01110011
Posts: 23136
1/8/20 7:52 pm


View user's profile Send private message
Reply with quote
Post Cojak
Dave Dorsey wrote:
Bro Bob wrote:
I know why I am being so outward and transparent about my situation. It is because when I was your age and I saw men of faith going through this I merely recall them being totally silent while they dealt with their loss in very different ways. I have seen them marry again very quickly and I have seen them go home and close the door.

Bro Bob, as a younger man, quite honestly at the moment with tears in my eyes, I cannot tell you how much I appreciate this. I notice it and see it and treasure it. I hear you and will continue to do so. Thank you.


And there you go again. And yes that last short comment of mine was thru tears as well. Love you guys. I may be off subject but when I am touched or blessed I want to say AMEN, SO AMEN!
_________________
Some facts but mostly just my opinion!
jacsher@aol.com
http://shipslog-jack.blogspot.com/
01000001 01100011 01110100 01110011
Posts: 23136
1/8/20 7:57 pm


View user's profile Send private message
Reply with quote
Post Link
[quote="Dave Dorsey"]
Link wrote:
H
I don't think an abusive spouse professing to be a believer subjects the wife to 1 Cor 7:10-11 and denies her the liberation of 1 Cor 7:12-15. It seems crystal clear to me that if a man is abusing his spouse, he is not a believer and is not consenting to live with her, and she is therefore not enslaved to endure his abuse or never know the joy of marriage.


Hmmm. This is in a section of scripture where Paul says he has no commandment from the Lord, and gives his own opinion. Of course there are abusive men who consent to dwell with their wives. But nowadays, I hear a lot of things called abuse-- emotional abuse, for example-- name calling. This is a damaging thing, too, and something I am opposed to, but if an unbeliever insults his wife from time to time, or even constantly, that's verbal abuse, right? Is it a reason to divorce? The pagans of Paul's day could have been quite rough to live with. And what of the believer who has a one-off (or two off, etc.) case of physical abuse? What about wives who hit their husbands in some argument or fit of rage? Do you apply it that way, too? I'm not justifying abuse, of course. I'm just seeing how the passage applies the way you are saying, and Paul said it was not the Lord's command. Paul had written, "But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband.
_________________
Link
Acts-perienced Poster
Posts: 11246
1/9/20 1:04 am


View user's profile Send private message
Reply with quote
Post Dave Dorsey
The quote at the end of your post applies to two believers who separate (to the married in verse 10, implicitly believers because the people in 12-16 are also married), not to "the rest" in the second half of the passage where a Christian party is "not enslaved" to an unbeliever who does not consent to live with him/her and is called by God to peace (15).

With respect, I'm not going to get into black or white analysis of hypothetical situations. Each situation has to be prayerfully considered and approached individually with faithfulness to Scripture, compassion, and grace. But I do see this passage as offering room for peace and non-enslavement for an abused or abandoned Christian spouse.
Now 67% friendlier!
Posts: 13039
1/9/20 7:55 am


View user's profile Send private message
Reply with quote
Post Dave Dorsey
And FWIW, I don't see any room in Scripture for divorce and remarriage by believing spouses. But I certainly believe Christ's blood can remit that sin as thoroughly as it can any other, and his grace can redeem the result, if there is genuine and true repentance for the heart condition that led to the sin. Now 67% friendlier!
Posts: 13039
1/9/20 8:09 am


View user's profile Send private message
Reply with quote
Post Carolyn Smith
Going back to our OP, I think the reason the COG is not so strenuously against divorce is that it has become more common in our ranks, even among ministers. Where it used to be a strict "No" to divorcees continuing in ministry, the rules have been relaxed (for whatever reason) and we all know or know of ministers who have been divorced (some more than once.)

I have heard of one minister (very well known & high in the ranks of the COG) whose wife divorced him. I want to say it was George Alford, but I'm not sure. He never looked back. He kept walking forward in ministry and never remarried. We will never know the heartbreak and loneliness of this minister who remained faithful to his call, no matter the cost. This just doesn't happen today, but you can't help but admire the commitment he had to his call from God.

I can't give you scripture and verse for this, but my advice to women in abusive relationships (or who are considering divorce) is this...You are the one who has to stand before God for this decision. I can't tell you what is the right decision - this is one you have to make. You need to hear from the Lord and follow His direction. If you are afraid for your life, leave. God can heal your marriage, but He can't do anything if you're dead.

A lot of people think divorce is the easy way out. Let me tell you that from the women I've witnessed go through it...it's not. Most of them struggle financially for years unless they have a really good job. They also struggle to believe they are women of worth and dignity and constantly question their self-worth.

I have also seen women regain their courage and strength once they are separate from the person who has torn them down in so many ways for so many years. And I have also witnessed divorced and even remarried women find their place in God, recognize His call on their lives and walk forward in His anointing. No, not as licensed ministers, but being used of God all the same. I don't understand it...it doesn't line up with my theology, but I don't have to. I will leave that between them and God.

I know of a COG in which a couple divorced, and people were later scandalized when he remarried her SISTER! Oh my! But guess who the Lord used in the service to interpret a message in tongues? The new wife. When I questioned the Lord, He told me in no uncertain terms not to call common what He had cleansed. Yes, Sir! I shut my mouth and decided to leave that to the Lord to sort out.

My personal opinion - the church needs to spend a lot more time extending grace than questioning people about why they divorced. We live in a world where divorce is rampant, and usually just as much in the church as in the world. Let's take the log out of our eyes so we can help them with their speck. Divorce is not the unforgivable sin according to the Bible. Let's do away with the scarlet letter and love people into the Kingdom.
_________________
"More of Him...less of me."
http://twitter.com/camiracle77
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=691241499&ref=name
Hon. Dr. in Acts-celeratology
Posts: 5417
1/12/20 11:36 pm


View user's profile Send private message
Reply with quote
Post Link
Carolyn Smith wrote:

I know of a COG in which a couple divorced, and people were later scandalized when he remarried her SISTER! Oh my! But guess who the Lord used in the service to interpret a message in tongues? The new wife. When I questioned the Lord, He told me in no uncertain terms not to call common what He had cleansed. Yes, Sir! I shut my mouth and decided to leave that to the Lord to sort out.


Since Judas did miracles and whether it was getting people saved or being used in healing, we can probably all think of preachers who were operating in spiritual gifts but had some sin in their lives. Judas had the power to heal and to do miracles, yet Jesus said He was a devil for He knew from the beginning who would betray him.

The same passage that says not to take a sister as a rival wife says not to lie with one's father's wife, too. Paul said to deliver a man over to Satan who'd done that. I wonder if his father was already dead. But whose to say that man was 'common' or couldn't interpret tongues if they'd let him in church. John the Baptist said to a man who had married his brother's wife, "It is not lawful for thee to have her."

Maybe all of us, myself included, should be resolved to stick our noses into other people's business, if they call themselves believers, and want to do something like this-- marry their sister-in-law, we should tell them that's crazy. I'm imagining grabbing some dud by the shoulders and saying, "Are you crazy! Don't marry your ex-wife's sister!"
_________________
Link
Acts-perienced Poster
Posts: 11246
1/13/20 1:48 am


View user's profile Send private message
Reply with quote
Display posts from previous:   
Actscelerate.com Forum Index -> Acts-Celerate Post new topic   Reply to topic
All times are GMT - 5 Hours
Goto page Previous  1, 2
Page 2 of 2

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum




Acts-celerate Terms of Use | Acts-celerate Policy
World News Network | Acts-celerate Chat
Contact the Administrator.


Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group :: Spelling by SpellingCow.