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SCFIRE

I need help!

Acts-celerater Posts: 713 **2/7/22 7:41 pm**

I probably should already know what to say but I don't. I'm having writers bloc. lol..... An barely teen ager was molested by a family member at 7 years old and she states she is mad at God and borders on not believing there is a God. Why didn't He stop the man that was molesting her because she was not strong enough to stop him plus she was scared? What can be told her?
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Cojak

01000001 01100011 01110100 01110011 Posts: 24276 **2/7/22 10:40 pm**

I certainly agree with her thinking. I have thought the same over my many years. IF it was tough for me to try to understand without just saying, it is in YOUR Hands Lord, I can understand a child's feelings toward God. Not that I understand one millionth of what she might have faced.
I hope I read a REAL answer that just might give her some solace.
What a tough situation!!!
Confused

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Quiet Wyatt

[Insert Acts Pun Here] Posts: 12792 **2/7/22 10:51 pm**

First, as a survivor of the sexual abuse, I can say I’m so sorry. I can also say this was not God’s will or God’s fault, but Satan’s (and the abuser who let the Devil influence him).

During this present age, in which God is giving all mankind the opportunity to choose between good and evil, God cannot stop all evil acts, or else mankind would lose personhood/agency, and would essentially become robots who could only do God’s will ever. Without the ability to do evil, there simply could be no ability to do good, either.

God will one day stop all evil and all unrepentant evildoers and child molesters will be punished absolutely justly, according to their deeds. Even still, God is not willing that any should perish, but that all should be brought to repentance, and He is giving humanity more time to repent, according to 2 Peter 3.

Cojak

01000001 01100011 01110100 01110011 Posts: 24276 **2/8/22 4:00 pm**

Somehow the story of Joseph comes to mind, not in sexual abuse, BUT abuse. He in the end was the winner. Maybe this child can somehow Know and help others that are abused. Maybe she can be a lightening rod of help for others that suffer in her shoes because she now KNOWS the horrors. Crying or Very sad

maybe she can be some ones HERO and get them out of a life of abuse as she hoped for herself!! Cool

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SCFIRE

Acts-celerater Posts: 713 **2/9/22 8:52 am**

Thanks Quiet Wyatt and Cojack for your input. Believe it or not it pushes me a little closer to an answer.

BUT, it would help to have a few more inputs>
Jump in.
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Cojak

01000001 01100011 01110100 01110011 Posts: 24276 **2/9/22 9:31 am**

Quiet Wyatt

[Insert Acts Pun Here] Posts: 12792 **2/9/22 12:08 pm**

God did not stop Adam and Eve from sinning, nor did He stop Cain from murdering Abel. This is the nature of the world we live in.

Gen. 4 1Now the man had relations with his wife Eve, and she conceived and gave birth to Cain, and she said, “I have gotten a manchild with the help of the LORD.” 2Again, she gave birth to his brother Abel. And Abel was a keeper of flocks, but Cain was a tiller of the ground. 3So it came about in the course of time that Cain brought an offering to the LORD of the fruit of the ground. 4Abel, on his part also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of their fat portions. And the LORD had regard for Abel and for his offering; 5but for Cain and for his offering He had no regard. So Cain became very angry and his countenance fell. 6Then the LORD said to Cain, “Why are you angry? And why has your countenance fallen? 7“If you do well, will not your countenance be lifted up? And if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door; and its desire is for you, but you must master it.” 8Cain told Abel his brother. And it came about when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother and killed him.

doyle

At Times, Our PRESENCE is more helpful than our attempts at answers.

doyle · Acts-celerate Owner Posts: 6957 **2/9/22 3:10 pm**

Apostle Peter said, "Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who ask you; to give the reason for the hope that you have."(l Peter 3:15).

OUR CONCEPT OF GOD is that He could have stopped it. We attempt to reason it out by saying, "God did not do this. The Devil did." I totally agree, but is Satan more powerful than God? Of course not!

Then, if God is more powerful, why was Satan allowed to influence someone to rape or kill? Of course that girl and her parents want answers. If it was our child we would too.

"ATTENTION ALL PERSONNEL" the voice over our Hospital PA System announced. "Code 42. Code 42." That is the Code for "Chaplain." Recognizing Helen's voice from our Security Office, I called in.

"Hi Helen, this is Chaplain Doyle. You paged me?"

"Yes Chaplain. NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) called. You are requested in Labor and Delivery. An almost full-term baby is Stillborn. They are going now to tell the parents. Can you stop by their room right away?"

"I'm on my way."

Taking the elevator up a floor, I walked down the hallway and into their room. Devastation. They were in shock. There is no sadder look on a woman's face than when she is told "Your baby didn't make it." Just thinking about it brings tears to my eyes.

"Hello, I'm Chaplain Doyle. I just heard what happened. May I be with you for awhile?" They nodded their heads. Through tears, the young husband said, "Our baby is dead and we are killed inside."

"I would be too, i said."

The young wife wife looked up and into my eyes. Why did this happen to our baby?" (Over 200 babies had been born alive and healthy just that month in our Hospital).

"I wish we knew," (A more gentle way of saying, "I don't know"). "Knowing your heart would be breaking, I wanted to come be with you." (Much of the time, even the doctors are not sure what happened. This is even more so when couples suffer a miscarriage).

As much as we want to give an answer as to WHY, it is often that our PRESENCE and compassion brings more solace than our attempts at providing answers.

Doyle
writedoyle@gmail.com
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Carolyn Smith

Hon. Dr. in Acts-celeratology Posts: 5909 **2/9/22 11:42 pm**

I agree with Doyle, that often it is not our answers that help people as much as our being there to help them through the rough places. Much can be said about being present in the moment of pain, offering support through your presence.

However, I might tell the person if they are angry with God, it's okay. God is big enough for us to be angry with Him, though of course, we need to eventually find a place of dealing with that anger. A friend of mine told me that someone told her God was big enough for her to be angry with Him, and she told God, "That's good, because I'm really ticked!"

I went through a time in my life in which I was very angry about a lot of different things in my life that I felt I had no control over. After talking with a counselor, he told me I was a very angry woman. Having been raised to believe that Christians should not/could not be angry, I believed "I am a Christian, therefore I am not angry." WRONG! A lot of us just learn to suppress it and then it comes flooding out on some unsuspecting person...

I asked the counselor what God thought about my being angry, and I'll never forget his answer. He said, "God understands." He told me that anger is a God-given emotion, given to us so that we will not allow others to harm us or our children, and the only time anger is a sin is when we want to use it to hurt someone else. As long as I am working to get through that anger, God will give me grace. The counselor proceeded through our counseling to help me understand and realize how to take my emotional temperature and realize that every emotion was not anger...and how to tell those emotions apart. Those tools helped me a lot in diffusing the anger in my life and learning how to deal with it more appropriately.

A person who has been abused probably needs professional counseling (though it was a pastor who had been trained that helped me.) There is likely anger, grief, shame, and a lot of other emotions that need to be addressed.

Perhaps you could also remind this person that God did not rescue His own Son when he was being crucified. He allowed it because there was a greater purpose. Remind them that God loves them very much, and even if they are angry, God's love for them will never change. He longs to help them find peace, and it is available to them if they will continue to seek Him.
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Quiet Wyatt

[Insert Acts Pun Here] Posts: 12792 **2/10/22 6:48 am**

I of course agree that victims need compassion and true godly love.

When we have a false, unscriptural view of God and how he works and a false, unscriptural view of humanity and moral agency or freewill, we consign ourselves and those to whom we minister to a mass of insuperable contradictions. Having a false, unscriptural view of God, self, and of the way the world operates never helps anyone get over their problems.

It is not legitimate to blame God for something another human did to us under Satan’s infiuence. Would Abel have been justified had he blamed God for his murder?