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 What is a "Christian Romance Novel?" |
Old Time Country Preacher |
We got a few older ladies in our church what reads "Christian Romance Novels." The reason I knowed is they brought some of em to a church yard sale an I was teasin em about what they was readin. They said, "Oh, these are Christian Romance Novels."
Now I have heard a Romance novels (course I never read one)--an I aint talkin bout no vulgar stuff, but the man gets woman or woman gets man kinda stuff where in the end they git married--but I commenced to wonderin what is a "Christian Romance Novel."
Is this the kinda thing where the plot a the novel is set in a church settin, or among Christian families an such? Could it be something that would include a paragraph like this:
I had just knelt in the altar during our annual Spring revival, an act that I observed religiously because no self respecting teenager in our church would miss the opportunity to get saved again, when a flash of light caught my attention. Almost without thinking, I glanced to my left and saw Mary Beth Greenwald. Every seventeen year old boy at North Pointe Community Church had aspirations of dating Mary Beth. Just as my eyes focused on Mary Beth I noticed she was looking at me. At that moment I knew. We were going to spend the rest of our lives together in missions work. I felt a streak of glory knee deep and a mile wide. Mary Beth felt it too, because she danced and shouted for over fifteen minutes around the altars that night. When the service finally settled down, I immediately went over to where Mary Beth was sitting, asked here to marry me, and to my disbelief she said "YES." We prayed together in the spirit for over an hour, confirming, reaffirming and confirming again what we had been called to do. Three months later Mary Beth and I were married. Three days later we traveled Papua New Guinea where we lived happily ever after.
Would this be kinda what a Christian Romance Novel is like?
Last edited by Old Time Country Preacher on 12/1/15 11:07 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Posts: 15566
12/1/15 10:33 am
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bonnie knox |
Absolutely not. If you want to git a whole book outta that story, ya gonna have ta have some trips to Shoney's, some walkin round in tha moonlight, some angst about all tha obstacles, some more walkin round in that moonlight, maybe a little more development a them other fellars what wanted ta date Mary Beth, some more angst about the obstacles, and so on. And it might be good to have Mary Beth thinking she wanted to be single cause she wanted to be a missionary till right at tha end where she finds out you want to be a missionary too. That's when THE KISS occurs. And that presents a little problem in itself. Ya got ta have that guy kissing like he's done it enough to have it right, but you don't want him to have been just some profligate. Some authors kill off a first wife or whatnot so as the hero can have a little experience under his belt, so ta speak. Usually he's not emotionally intact. He's got some kinda wound that Miss Mary Beth is gonna put the cosmic patch on. So it just wouldn't do for him to be a rank teenager with no other issues than a reluctance to be in church 5 times a week. Now Miss Mary Beth can be as naïve and UNTUTORED (that's the word they like to use as to the poor girl's lips with respect ta her kissing technique) as ya please. She usually don't hardly even know she wants to kiss a feller; she just knows she gits a little agitated whenever he's around. Then, of course, they's usually somethin that she has to be rescued from as well, not to mention he's got ta help her figure out that agitation is that she really wants him to kiss her. The main thing about Christian vs. non-Christian romance is that the Christian romances don't have their protagonists jumpin in tha sack until after they married. And dependin on tha author, they don't set around drinkin wine, brandy, and bourbon at ever turn, and they don't cuss. Otherwise, they have the same values!
I hope that helps explain it. (I know ya want ta know how I know. I done been researchin it like you do em Woffies.)
Ole Timer, ya need to pray for them ladies what's readin that stuff. |
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Posts: 14803
12/1/15 12:05 pm
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| Hmmmmm |
roughridercog |
How about reading Song of Solomon aloud from the NLT without blushing?
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Doctor of Bovinamodulation |
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Posts: 25306
12/1/15 1:41 pm
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Dave Dorsey |
They are typically very clean, very pure stories in which two characters court and marry, usually in the face of some complication, difficulty, or antagonist. There is nothing unseemly or inappropriate about them. They are simply character-driven stories that lack sex and perversion and occur within the framework of a worldview that honors Christ.
Leave it to some to throw rocks at them, though. Maybe we should just burn all the books. |
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12/1/15 1:55 pm
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| Romance Stories in a Nutshell... |
Aaron Scott |
Pretty and/or otherwise unwed women is main character.
She is torn between two men.
One man is dashing and daring.
The other is quiet, competent.
One is better off than the other.
One has a harder go of it.
She is torn! Both have something to recommend them.
Finally, she chooses. It might be that the one guy shows himself to be a cad. But whomever she chooses, it will NOT BE THE ONE THAT EVERYONE THOUGHT SHE WOULD MARRY AT THE BEGINNING.
There. I saved y'all a whole lot of mindless reading. Just pick the guy that is the richest, handsomest, most dashing...and pick the other guy. |
Hon. Dr. in Acts-celeratology
Posts: 6032
12/1/15 2:46 pm
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| Re: Romance Stories in a Nutshell... |
Old Time Country Preacher |
| Aaron Scott wrote: | Pretty and/or otherwise unwed women is main character.
She is torn between two men.
One man is dashing and daring.
The other is quiet, competent.
One is better off than the other.
One has a harder go of it.
She is torn! Both have something to recommend them.
Finally, she chooses. It might be that the one guy shows himself to be a cad. But whomever she chooses, it will NOT BE THE ONE THAT EVERYONE THOUGHT SHE WOULD MARRY AT THE BEGINNING.
There. I saved y'all a whole lot of mindless reading. Just pick the guy that is the richest, handsomest, most dashing...and pick the other guy. |
Aaron, sounds like you well versed in this particular genre a literature an all.  |
Acts-pert Poster
Posts: 15566
12/1/15 3:16 pm
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| Here is a good one |
JLarry |
Jerry Wiley's Vacation.
By none other than our very own Cojak.
It is filled with romance and suspense.
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No one who died without Christ is happy about their decision. |
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12/1/15 3:36 pm
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| Re: Romance Stories in a Nutshell... |
Dave Dorsey |
| Aaron Scott wrote: | | Just pick the guy that is the richest, handsomest, most dashing...and pick the other guy. |
Hey... it worked for your wife.  |
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Posts: 13654
12/1/15 3:50 pm
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bonnie knox |
| Nope, Aaron, I used to read a magazine years ago which each month would feature a condensed and sanitized romance novel. I distinctly remember one called "Fine Things." I kid you not, the hero was a rich man named Mr. Fine. Yep, the pretty young woman got him. I was impressed with the way he proposed--gave her a pair of shoes all bedecked with rhinestones and gaudy baubles. There hiding amongst the baubles was a huge diamond ring. I liked that so much I talked Cojak into letting his billionaire protagonist in Finally Love propose with a diamond ring tied to the grosgrain ribbon around a teddy bear's neck. |
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12/1/15 4:13 pm
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Old Time Country Preacher |
| bonnie knox wrote: | | The main thing about Christian vs. non-Christian romance is that the Christian romances...don't cuss. |
Think I'm understandin this thing a little better. Looks like a few a the senior gals in the ole timer's church has been readin romance novels where bout any an ever thing is OK, long as they don't cuss. |
Acts-pert Poster
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12/1/15 11:23 pm
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bonnie knox |
| Old Time Country Preacher wrote: | | bonnie knox wrote: | | The main thing about Christian vs. non-Christian romance is that the Christian romances...don't cuss. |
Think I'm understandin this thing a little better. Looks like a few a the senior gals in the ole timer's church has been readin romance novels where bout any an ever thing is OK, long as they don't cuss. |
An iffen they do cuss, cause authors want ta make the story real an all, they just put one letter and then a line after it, like "d___."
But the girls never cuss. Or gamble. Or drink. But, hey, kissin is alright.
Now if the author is of the Episcopal persuasion, the character might have a little glass a brandy in his study or whatnot. |
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Posts: 14803
12/1/15 11:32 pm
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bonnie knox |
| Now, Ole Timer, I keep readin what ya writ in the OP. I cain't help but think that might make a right good story. Ya wouldn't call it romance, but maybe just a genral fiction story. |
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Posts: 14803
12/1/15 11:34 pm
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Cojak |
For Romance I recommend 'Finally Love', She picks the Billionaire.
I also recommend 'The Vacation', same couple, Hey I write Senior Romance because I live it OT. YOu should orta read some and expand your horizons. I know Miz OTCP would appreciate it. The seniors just happen to be Christians.
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jacsher@aol.com
http://shipslog-jack.blogspot.com/ |
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Posts: 24277
12/1/15 11:35 pm
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Carolyn Smith |
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bonnie knox |
| Quote: | | YOu should orta read some and expand your horizons. I know Miz OTCP would appreciate it. |
HA! The first thing Miz OTCP would do is git suspicious of how come Mr Ole Timer was actin sa outta the ordinary!
I can almost envision it.
Mr OTCP: Hey Momma, let's go git us a hot fudge cake at Shoney's.
Mrs: Sounds good ta me.
Mr OTCP: And then let's take a little walk down by the river.
Mrs: It'll be too dark ta fish by then.
Mr OTCP: I ain't talkin bout fishin.
Mrs: You ain't got no trot line set that you a wantin ta check do ya.
Mr OTCP: Naw, I ain't got no trot line, I just thought ya might like to walk along in the moonlight like ya used to.
Mrs: Ya gittin ready to ask a big favor of me ain't ya, and ya tryin ta soften me up. Just go on an git it out in tha open.
Mr OTCP: I ain't got no favor ta ask. Just come on an git in the car, and we'll commence this discussion AFTER we have them fudge cakes.
Mrs: If I didn't know better I'd think you was a hittin the moonshine agin with all this crazy talk about the river. Or is it that internet thing what's got ya so stirred up. What is it they call it, that Actsly Madison?
Mr OTCP: Momma, it's ACTS! ACTS, that's where I spend ma time.
Maybe we can just forgit the river, have a cup of coffee and watch Wheel a Fortune. |
[Insert Acts Pun Here]
Posts: 14803
12/1/15 11:48 pm
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Cojak |
| bonnie knox wrote: | | Quote: | | YOu should orta read some and expand your horizons. I know Miz OTCP would appreciate it. |
HA! The first thing Miz OTCP would do is git suspicious of how come Mr Ole Timer was actin sa outta the ordinary!
I can almost envision it.
Mr OTCP: Hey Momma, let's go git us a hot fudge cake at Shoney's.
Mrs: Sounds good ta me.
Mr OTCP: And then let's take a little walk down by the river.
Mrs: It'll be too dark ta fish by then.
Mr OTCP: I ain't talkin bout fishin.
Mrs: You ain't got no trot line set that you a wantin ta check do ya.
Mr OTCP: Naw, I ain't got no trot line, I just thought ya might like to walk along in the moonlight like ya used to.
Mrs: Ya gittin ready to ask a big favor of me ain't ya, and ya tryin ta soften me up. Just go on an git it out in tha open.
Mr OTCP: I ain't got no favor ta ask. Just come on an git in the car, and we'll commence this discussion AFTER we have them fudge cakes.
Mrs: If I didn't know better I'd think you was a hittin the moonshine agin with all this crazy talk about the river. Or is it that internet thing what's got ya so stirred up. What is it they call it, that Actsly Madison?
Mr OTCP: Momma, it's ACTS! ACTS, that's where I spend ma time.
Maybe we can just forgit the river, have a cup of coffee and watch Wheel a Fortune. |
I can believe this one!!!
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Some facts but mostly just my opinion!
jacsher@aol.com
http://shipslog-jack.blogspot.com/ |
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Posts: 24277
12/2/15 12:10 am
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| Re: Romance Stories in a Nutshell... |
Nature Boy Florida |
| Dave Dorsey wrote: | | Aaron Scott wrote: | | Just pick the guy that is the richest, handsomest, most dashing...and pick the other guy. |
Hey... it worked for your wife. |
Dave - that was spot on - and made me laugh. Thanks.
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Whether you like it or not, learn to love it, because its the best thing going today! |
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Posts: 16619
12/2/15 10:45 am
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| OTCP and Dave Dorsey... |
Aaron Scott |
OTCP said:
| Quote: | | Aaron, sounds like you well versed in this particular genre a literature an all. |
Let's keep that our little secret, shall we? Furthermore, let's keep it our little secret.
Dave Dorsey said (to how the woman never picks the most dashing man, etc.):
| Quote: | | Hey... it worked for your wife. |
I...OK, I've got nothing. So that leaves me with NO CHOICE but to do this: I REBUKE YOU!
There. Consider yourself rebuke-ed. |
Hon. Dr. in Acts-celeratology
Posts: 6032
12/2/15 1:03 pm
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Nature Boy Florida |
Aaron, Dave was just stating the facts. Don't rebuke the mailman.
We all knew it.
Your wife certainly knew it.
Now you know it.
I'm sorry. I know this must be hurtful to face reality. 
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Whether you like it or not, learn to love it, because its the best thing going today! |
Acts-pert Poster
Posts: 16619
12/2/15 2:57 pm
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