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doyle

Why I am DOWN emotionally today

Acts-celerate Owner Posts: 6957 **1/15/16 6:00 pm**

At about 6pm Thursday, a 52 year-old patient in ICU went into cardiac arrest. Our Code-Blue team members rushed to his room and worked with him for 45 minutes, but could not revive a pulse. The doctor and I made the dreaded trudge to the family waiting room to let them know their Loved One did not survive.

The patient's daughter, age 22, had just moved from Michigan to the Atlanta area to live closer to her parents. As can be expected, the family was devastated; blown away by the tragic and unexpected bad news. After the doctor left, I stayed with them for several hours, consoling where possible. I stayed with them as they began notifying friends and extended family.

We prayed together for strength in their difficult time. Scripture says "God is a present help in the time of trouble." They so much needed His presence.

They wanted to see him and after the room was cleaned (Code Blue response sometimes has 15 or more medical people in the room with all of them desperately trying to revive the patient.) I led the family to him and stayed with them as they saw him and began coming to terms that he was gone from them. They stayed with his body for several hours. We gathered at his bedside, held hands and prayed.

I returned several times from being with patients in the ER, to check on them. They were kind and gracious. They hugged my neck and thanked me for being there with them. At around midnight, they went home to get some sleep.

This morning, the patient's wife was back at the hospital - arriving by ambulance. During the night, the wife had taken an overdose of sleeping pills. The daughter called 911 but when the wife arrived at the hospital, her life in this life was gone. When I heard the news, I had to find a place to sit down briefly.

It was not a case of being weak in the knees. My heart was so heavy for their daughter and for the precious one who had ended her own life, that I sat down for a moment. Instead of burying her dad, the daughter is now making preparations to bury her father and mother.

I have struggled with the situation. I have wondered if there was something more I could have done for them that the wife would not have taken her life. She didn't show any outward signs of harming herself. We are trained to look for that when people are suddenly thrust into deep grief. I've backed the mental video of the entire situation up and played it in my mind several times.

Late last night, I texted a friend and shared that I was feeling down because of the situation. Is there something I missed?

This morning, he called and said he had a "Word" for me about the situation. He said, "Jesus spent years doing all He could to help Judas. Judas had heard Jesus preach and pray and teach. And yet, Judas ended up taking his own life. No one can blame Jesus for the decision Judas made.

It was the word of hope I needed. I'm still feeling down about it but the flow of patients is continuous. No complaint here - there are amazing opportunities to be a strength to people who are hurting. Like you, I'm Called to do it.

I felt led of the Lord to make this post. It may be that in your important ministry, there is someone who has slipped away from you either in death or from backsliding. You did all you knew to do and yet, they slipped away. It's not your fault. Such final decisions are in theirs' and God's hands.

God has done all He can for mankind. He gave His only Son and yet, millions do not heed his loving desire to help them. The Lord has even prepared a place for them but the decision to accept that gift of God, is exclusively theirs.

Doyle
_________________
The largest room in the world is the room for improvement.

diakoneo

Golf Cart Mafia Consigliere Posts: 3382 **1/15/16 6:11 pm**

Doyle, thanks for sharing that. I know that it has been a rough couple of days for you. That was a good word from your friend. I will be praying for you and this precious daughter.

This story hit me pretty hard. I am 52. Something you also need to know is that the wife may have been menopausal. I know there is no excuse for suicide, but me and my wife both have been struggling with things related to mid-life, lately. Some crazy emotions and depression and all kinds of other things.

Through it all, thank God for His ever present grace!

bonnie knox

[Insert Acts Pun Here] Posts: 14803 **1/15/16 7:18 pm**

Cojak

01000001 01100011 01110100 01110011 Posts: 24284 **1/15/16 10:22 pm**