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Your Criteria for Performing Wedding Ceremonies
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Post Your Criteria for Performing Wedding Ceremonies Link
I was listening to a preacher on the radio today who said he would marry two unsaved folks or two saved folks, but not a saved with an unsaved person.

I was just thinking of some of the criteria I've heard or read preachers and other folks give for getting married both in the US and overseas. I thought I'd list some of them. Btw, I don't agree with all of these.

Which of these are your criteria for performing a wedding? Which are not on your list? What would you add?

1. The two must be of opposite genders.
2. The parents must consent to it.
3. The father of the bride must consent.
4. Those getting married must be legal adults.
5. The married couple couldn't have lived together in the same house if they want you to marry them.
6. They have to be of the same race.
7. Neither one of them could have been divorced.
8. Neither one of them could have been divorced unless....[insert here].
9. They have to have completed marriage counseling (with you or someone else.)
10. Neither one of them can be currently married to someone else.
11. They can't be close kin.
12. They can be close kin, but not of the type whose intermarriage is forbidden in Leviticus 18.


What are your criteria? If you aren't licensed, etc. to perform weddings, what would your criteria be if you were?
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1/9/13 10:59 pm


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Post JLarry
One man, One woman. Acts Mod
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1/9/13 11:50 pm


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Post Rafael D Martinez
they will have done premarital counseling by either myself or a pastor preferably not related to either of them
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1/10/13 1:02 am


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Post Link
JLarry wrote:
One man, One woman.


If a COG minister did a so-called 'gay wedding', what would the denomination do?
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Post dtgrant
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'gay wedding'


An oxymoron!
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1/10/13 7:11 am


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Post Re: Your Criteria for Performing Wedding Ceremonies Dave Dorsey
Link wrote:
6. They have to be of the same race.

Shocked

Edit: My Shocked is not to Link as though he agreed with this. (I don't know if he does or not.) Just to that it would be on any reasonable list.


Last edited by Dave Dorsey on 1/10/13 10:15 am; edited 1 time in total
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Post Eddie Robbins
He didn't say he agreed with it, only what he has heard. I have heard that one too and not all that long ago.

In the first post, I would ask the preacher the question.....how do YOU know who is saved and who is not? By YOUR standard?
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Post Re: Your Criteria for Performing Wedding Ceremonies Quiet Wyatt
1. The two must be of opposite genders--since birth.
2. They must obtain a marriage license with the state if the marriage is to be contracted in a state or country where a marriage license is obtainable.
3. If divorced, they either must have had biblical grounds for the divorce or have been divorced against their will, which would be tantamount to desertion, adultery and unfaithfulness.
4. They have to have completed marriage counseling (with you or someone else.)
5. Neither one of them can be currently married to someone else.
6. If the individuals are well known to me and only one of them professes to be a Christian, I would not agree to perform the ceremony unless and until the unbelieving party were convincingly converted.
7. If after talking and/or counseling with the couple I find reason to doubt the good faith and sincerity of either, I would not consent to perform the wedding for them.


Last edited by Quiet Wyatt on 1/10/13 8:34 am; edited 2 times in total
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1/10/13 8:23 am


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Post Quiet Wyatt
Link wrote:
JLarry wrote:
One man, One woman.


If a COG minister did a so-called 'gay wedding', what would the denomination do?


I would surely hope that would fall under conduct unbecoming to a minister, and would result in permanent revocation of credentials.
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1/10/13 8:30 am


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Post Eddie Robbins
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the unbelieving party were convincingly converted.


Uh oh. How can I convince you that I believe that Jesus is who He says He is? What if I say....I really, really believe it. Would that convince you? What criteria would you use that the Bible doesn't use?

Just asking. Very Happy
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Post Quiet Wyatt
I would not use any criteria that the New Testament doesn't use. I don't agree with the easy believism to which you refer. [Insert Acts Pun Here]
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Post Quiet Wyatt
While I definitely don't agree with everything John MacArthur teaches and differ with him on a few minor points in this article, I agree with the basic idea of this article by him with regard to true conversion: http://www.gty.org/resources/positions/p03/examine-yourself [Insert Acts Pun Here]
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Post Here is another excellent biblical summary from John Piper: Quiet Wyatt
Quote:
John gives at least eleven evidences that a person is born again. We could probably boil them all down to faith and love. But for now we’ll let them stand the way he says them. Not every verse below uses new-birth language. But it will be plain, if you think about it for a moment, that even where the language is not present, the reality is. Here they are:
1. Those who are born of God keep his commandments.
1 John 2:3–4: “By this we know that we have come to know him, if we keep his commandments. Whoever says ‘I know him’ but does not keep his commandments is a liar, and the truth is not in him.”
1 John 3:24: “Whoever keeps his commandments abides in God, and God in him.”

2. Those who are born of God walk as Christ walked.
1 John 2:5–6: “By this we may know that we are in him: whoever says he abides in him ought to walk in the same way in which he walked.”

3. Those who are born of God don’t hate others but love them.
1 John 2:9: “Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness.”
1 John 3:14: “We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brothers. Whoever does not love abides in death.”
1 John 4:7–8: “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.”
1 John 4:20: “If anyone says, ‘I love God,’ and hates his brother, he is a liar.”

4. Those who are born of God don’t love the world.
1 John 2:15: “If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.”

5. Those who are born of God confess the Son and receive (have) him.
1 John 2:23: “No one who denies the Son has the Father. Whoever confesses the Son has the Father also.”
1 John 4:15: “Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God.”
1 John 5:12: “Whoever has the Son has life; whoever does not have the Son of God does not have life.”

6. Those who are born of God practice righteousness.
1 John 2:29: “If you know that he is righteous, you may be sure that everyone who practices righteousness has been born of him.”

7. Those who are born of God don’t make a practice of sinning.
1 John 3:6: “No one who abides in him keeps on sinning; no one who keeps on sinning has either seen him or known him.”
1 John 3:9–10: “No one born of God makes a practice of sinning, for God’s seed abides in him, and he cannot keep on sinning because he has been born of God. By this it is evident who are the children of God, and who are the children of the devil: whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is the one who does not love his brother.”
1 John 5:18: “We know that everyone who has been born of God does not keep on sinning, but he who was born of God protects him, and the evil one does not touch him.”

8. Those who are born of God possess the Spirit of God.
1 John 3:24: “By this we know that he abides in us, by the Spirit whom he has given us.”
1 John 4:13: “By this we know that we abide in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit.”

9. Those who are born of God listen submissively to the apostolic Word.
1 John 4:6: “We are from God. Whoever knows God listens to us; whoever is not from God does not listen to us. By this we know the Spirit of truth and the spirit of error.”

10. Those who are born of God believe that Jesus is the Christ.
1 John 5:1: “Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has been born of God.”

11. Those who are born of God overcome the world.
1 John 5:4: “Everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith.”

http://trinityfel.org/freetruth/?p=207
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1/10/13 9:19 am


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Post Eddie Robbins
Quiet Wyatt wrote:
I would not use any criteria that the New Testament doesn't use. I don't agree with the easy believism to which you refer.


Then, how do you know? What criteria do you use? ALL of those things? As anyone saved? Laughing

Anyone who keeps ALL the commandments? Uh oh. I'm in trouble.
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1/10/13 9:45 am


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Post Quiet Wyatt
Eddie Robbins wrote:
Quiet Wyatt wrote:
I would not use any criteria that the New Testament doesn't use. I don't agree with the easy believism to which you refer.


Then, how do you know? What criteria do you use? ALL of those things? As anyone saved? :lol:

Anyone who keeps ALL the commandments? Uh oh. I'm in trouble.


See my previous two posts.
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1/10/13 9:48 am


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Post Quiet Wyatt
A Christian is one who has submitted His life to Jesus as LORD. If we love Him, as a rule we keep his commandments. [Insert Acts Pun Here]
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Post Eddie Robbins
Quiet Wyatt wrote:
A Christian is one who has submitted His life to Jesus as LORD. If we love Him, as a rule we keep his commandments.


And, when you are interviewing a couple, how do you know they have and do? That is the question. How do you judge?
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Post Dave Dorsey
Eddie Robbins wrote:
He didn't say he agreed with it, only what he has heard. I have heard that one too and not all that long ago.

Thanks, I clarified my post to make my intent clear also.
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1/10/13 10:16 am


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Post Quiet Wyatt
Eddie Robbins wrote:
Quiet Wyatt wrote:
A Christian is one who has submitted His life to Jesus as LORD. If we love Him, as a rule we keep his commandments.


And, when you are interviewing a couple, how do you know they have and do? That is the question. How do you judge?


Primarily I only perform weddings for people I know personally, whom I have served as pastor. So that makes discerning true Christians from false pretty straightforward.

I'm not sure where you're getting to idea that I believe a true a Christian has never disobeyed God ever. A true Christian, to the extent of his understanding, presently loves God supremely and his neighbor as himself, and if he sins he is chastened/disciplined by the Lord for the purpose of restoring him to the strait and narrow way that leads to life. He does not make a practice of sinning, as 1 John plainly states.
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1/10/13 10:47 am


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Post Re: Your Criteria for Performing Wedding Ceremonies Troy Hamby
Link wrote:


11. They can't be close kin.


well, that rules out half the marriages in the South Very Happy
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1/10/13 10:59 am


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