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It all boils down to status....
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Post Randy Johnson
I have read that most people only have a few lifelong friends their entire lives and they can usually count them on one hand.

It is true for me. I've been in the ministry for 30 years, pastored four full time churches in the A/G, been an associate at one COG for five years, and pastored in Huntington, IN for just short of two years. In over 30 years of ministry I have made numerous acquaintances, but there are only two men in the entire world that I would call my lifelong friends.
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8/22/11 10:21 pm


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Post Dear one, remember ... Poimen
There is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother. Wink
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8/22/11 11:48 pm


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Post Troy Hamby
sad thing is that I don't trust other ministers father than I could throw them. I've seen way too much back stabbing and brown nosing for me to want to be a part of that group anyway. I have a couple of pastor friends outside of the COG but I am not broken up about not having many COG friends. Golf Cart Mafia Soldier
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8/23/11 7:56 am


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Post Nature Boy Florida
I have a bunch of COG pastors that are my friends. Very good friends that I trust completely.

I have several that appear to be my enemies.

Not sure it is any better somewhere else.
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8/23/11 8:06 am


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Post If I understand Mikes post Larry Wiley
I don't think he was talking about long term friends. The long term friends will be with us.

Yes a "friend" will stick closer than a brother. The qusetion is who are our "friends". In times like Mike has faced is when "friends" will be there.
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8/23/11 8:08 am


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Post Nature Boy Florida
Pastors need to quit feeling like it is only them.

When you leave any job -
your "status" of that job -
and the circle of "friends" you have because of it -
leaves with you.

It's just the way it is.
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8/23/11 8:12 am


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Post A few years ago... roughridercog
I was a pastor nobody wanted.
I took a church nobody wanted.

It was one of the most rewarding times and personal growth times I've ever faced.

I've been gone from that little church for years, but when I drive through there, I feel the warmth in my heart. We were a pastor and church who...

Needed each other
Loved each other
Ministered to each other.

I can see God's plan in it now looking backwards.

I can only give this advice.

Find a mountain nobody wants. Look at it and say, "Give me this mountain."

Just some advice from my walk with the Lord.
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8/23/11 8:20 am


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Post Lifer
If you don't worry about what people think of you, then you will not worry when they don't think of you. Friendly Face
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8/23/11 10:26 am


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Post sheepdogandy
Lifer wrote:
If you don't worry about what people think of you, then you will not worry when they don't think of you.


BINGO! Laughing
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8/23/11 11:18 am


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Post Praying for you Mike C. Chris Moody
Mike,

It hurts me to see you hurting. I don't think this board is the place to vent and be heard. It appears someone has caused this pain. I would advise you to go to your brother and make it right with him. It is easy to lose focus when one person does you wrong. I am even questioning myself here. As I recall, you were in service with me one Sunday. I sincerely apologize for not taking time to encourage and follow up with you on your ministry desires. I have noticed you not being around and I am sure others have as well. I thought you had planted a church. You and I were never close, but we are brothers and co laborers in the harvest. Trust me, I had no idea you were this wounded. You can call me any time.

I have never been one to forget brothers who leave the COG. My best friend today is Edwin Lipsey. He is no longer affiliated with the COG. He was asked to surrender his credentials. He was mistreated IMHO. I have never turned my back on him. He preaches for me and I preach for him also.

My advise is to let some things go. Call me any time day or night. 423-280-8247. I would call you, but do not have a number.
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8/23/11 11:18 am


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Post Eddie Robbins
Quote:
I don't think this board is the place to vent and be heard


That's ironic.....because of the board, you know his story and can reach out to him. Same for me too. The board is not a bad place to be heard, actually. There are some pretty good people here. We have seen it in the past. Very Happy
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8/23/11 11:26 am


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Post Is it really status or just a fact of life ... ? Kevin Summitt
I resigned in 07, had some surgery on my neck. I began to feel the same way BUT … I knew the Lord had told me to wait and maybe that’s the key? We have had several offers & interviews, folks wanting us to come be on there staff … BUT God said wait. Very similar resume Mike, but what you must realize is the season you’re in. Those minister friends you were close to have had to move on because your lives are not in the same vain now. I have been working a secular job (assuming you are too) now since 08. Not out of ministry but in transition. You can’t go to the Prayer Conferences, General Assembly and Youth Camps … all the places you use to go with your friends because you work and they are on different time schedules. I have had to make the effort to be with them. Take vacations around those events and if they mean that much to you then do the same.
Will there be those who tell shun you … sure. Will there be those who look down on you … sure. But you don’t answer to those folks, you answer to God. I have had those who have said to me …“You get your name out of the loop your ministry is dead.” They didn’t call me God did. My answer is and always will be “God said wait.” Don’t create an Ishmael and do something just to be in the pulpit. Then, you become a hireling, prostituting you calling for a paycheck. SO many folks are doing that all over the country and our churches / people are paying the price. Then my flesh nosed in … “Was God finished with me in the ministry?” Yet knowing God said “wait” the thought was still there. Believe me … it’s been lonely at times. It was 2 years before any contact from the State Office (and I was on a state appointed committee at the time). Reporting was on time and up to date, No reason. It just happened.
Anyway Mike … you must be settled in your spirit with the season God has you in right now and bump what everybody else may says or do. I call this my Pauline season … Content in what ever state I find myself making tents till the Master says go. (Phil 4:11-12, Acts 18:3)

So I don't think it's all about status. If you change secular jobs the same thing will happen ...?
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8/23/11 12:31 pm


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Post Re: Praying for you Mike Ichthus77
C. Chris Moody wrote:
My best friend today is Edwin Lipsey. He is no longer affiliated with the COG. He was asked to surrender his credentials. He was mistreated IMHO. I have never turned my back on him. He preaches for me and I preach for him also.



I don't know who Edwin Lipsey is or what his circumstances are but doing a google search, seems like he is doing quite well for the Lord! Seems like a pretty cool church he is pastoring. I noticed the church uses the COG DOF, but is a "cooperating body of the Assemblies of God".
Hey more power to them! I don't think God cares much about labels as long as the doctrine is sound.
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8/23/11 2:44 pm


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Post Nature Boy. 4golf
Pastoring is not a job and "True Pastors" those that are called by God are men of intergity and are men that are lead by the Holy Spirit and not are people that are lead by who is on what consuel. God calls Pastors "Not Politicans" ! at least that is what the Word of God says! The Word was long before any denominations were ever formend Bound By Beaulah
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8/23/11 3:22 pm


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Post Re: Nature Boy. Nature Boy Florida
4golf wrote:
Pastoring is not a job and "True Pastors" those that are called by God are men of intergity and are men that are lead by the Holy Spirit and not are people that are lead by who is on what consuel. God calls Pastors "Not Politicans" ! at least that is what the Word of God says! The Word was long before any denominations were ever formend


Sorry golf - i thought most of you got paid - which makes it a job.

I got news for you - God calls Doctors and Programmers too.

Regarding this thread - I don't get your point. Poster said he lost a lot of friends when he left his job. I said that was common to every job, including pastor - I was right.

You better get me that quote that God said he didn't call politicians. Seems he takes an interest in who the leader of countries are - all the way back to Saul - but you are too dense to see it.
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8/23/11 4:09 pm


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Post Money 4golf
NAture Boy most of them it is a job. But not everybody. When I was Pastoring at my last church I got paid $350.00 a week. My wife lost her job it was in the fall my work slowed down and most of the weeks I gave back to the church$250.00 some times I gave my whole check back. I was a bivocal pastor.My wife was making over $50,000 a year and her job provided our insurance. On paper there was "NO WAY" we could make it but God provided. When the Holy Spirit told me my time at that church was up I told the D.O and then went to th Admin Bishop and never worried or second guess that call. The very hour the Holy Spirit told me my time was over at this church, I got a call from another D.O telling me about a opening at another church. If people are treating the role of a pastor as a job they are not walking by faith and probly not called by God. Some still hold the reverant Fear of God every time they step into that pulpit as a spokes man for God. Bound By Beaulah
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8/23/11 9:41 pm


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Post georgiapath
Nature Boy Florida wrote:
Pastors need to quit feeling like it is only them.

When you leave any job -
your "status" of that job -
and the circle of "friends" you have because of it -
leaves with you.

It's just the way it is.


That is so true.
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8/24/11 4:30 am


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Post Sorry I lit this fuse and ran away but I've been recovering. Mike Burgner
from a kidney stone attack. Today I'm off work and got plenty of time to surf the net. Smile

1. To those of you who say it will happen with secular jobs as well I 100% disagree. I've worked for 2 other HVAC companies in this area and still today have people calling me to have lunch, or just to check on me and see what's up. I've been treated better by heathens in the HVAC industry than my colleagues in the COG what I was born in.
2. I tried to stay connected. I went to the campmeetings and ministers retreats after the fact. I've been on both sides of the fence. Those of you who haven't been in the shoes of us whose ministry status has changed and not pastoring or holding a ministry position any longer can't understand how weird it is.
[] You dread going to a state meeting because you dread the question, "what are you doing now? or Where are you pastoring now." Then you've got to come up with some answer you're not ashamed of like, "I'm in transition, or I'm between assignment, or I'm taking some time off."
[] Crazy stuff goes through your head like "This pastor doesn't want me here at his church, he's afraid I'm gonna steal some of his people and plant a new church." Then you get to the point of not even wanting to go to church, find a big church where nobody knows you, or go to church outside the COG.
[] When you attempt to be around other ministers your mind plays games on you and voices inside your head tell you things like "They think I've sinned. They think I'm a trouble-maker. They think I'm a rebel, a loser, a horrible Christian for not being in the ministry. They're wondering what's wrong with me.

I'm being very open, honest, and transparent here. Those of you who've been in my shoes hopefully can add your inside to the mind games, etc. The point is you get to the place where you just quit going to the meetings, because its not the same any longer. You're still a minister. You still have credentials, but your status overrides all of that.
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8/24/11 8:37 am


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Post Mike Cojak
I am glad you have this outlet. Believe it or not there are many who know pretty much what you are going thru.

Sometimes I think back and if I had had some of this support I might not have 'back slid' to an agnostic/athiest position. I don't know that, but I know I did not know how to 'tell' someone just how I felt.

Believe it or not as a pastor of a growing thriving church I had doubts, my mind played games also. It is hard also to make up 'good stories' to explain your church & life are going great, but your spirit is dying and you do not know why.

My advice is keep doing what youare doing at present. As long as you are sure of your calling God will take care of the rest.

Hang in there brother and get it all off your chest, and listen closely to HIS directions.

Love you young brother, If he called you, he has something for you, pray & Listen.
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8/24/11 9:53 am


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Post Quiet Wyatt
Major transitions are usually difficult and painful.

Your true friends will still be your friends no matter your current status.

Shallow, insincere 'friends' never were true friends to begin with. In my experience realizing this fact is basically the most painful and difficult thing to deal with.

Unfortunately most church culture today is simply not built on genuine kingdom relationships but on superficial things like 'status'.
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8/24/11 9:59 am


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