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Battling with the inner "me"
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Post Battling with the inner "me" roughridercog
If you ain't got one, pray for those of us who do. Laughing


All of us have an inner "us" that we learn to not let out. We get better at it as we get older, but as I understand it, in later years, the clutch slips and our inner "us" leaks out with disastrous results.
Today was a test of my clutch on my inner self. Thankfully, it doesn't slip yet.
I decided to go for a relaxing walk along the lake hoping to ease a minor headache. Making my way past some stores, I entered into a coffee shop. Ahead of me were four college age kids. One of these wanna be adults said he would like a venti carmeletto with skim milk and three squirts of raspberry syrup. (At least this is what I heard.).
The girl proceeds to take two minutes to put this concoction together. Finally, the next brain dead individual steps up. He orders a venti something-Etta with whipped cream, but no chocolate sprinkles. He wants cinnamon sprinkled over his.
I'm standing there exasperated next to a retired marine that I could have sworn was reaching into his pocket for brass knuckles. I stood there, my head throbbing, and the inner "me" wanted to take control of the situation by lifting the person ordering above my head, heaving him across the counter and screaming hysterically, "It's coffee you pencil necked geek! Man up and order coffee!

I didn't do it. With my eyes glazed from my effort to hold back the "me" inside, I left the establishment to face the world outside. (I have no idea what the old Marine with the brass knuckles was going to do, but I was rooting for him.)

I stepped outside to hopefully calm my inner Hulk and let the calmer Bruce Banner prevail, when I'm nearly run over by a fleet of millennial couples with baby carriages with no infants inside. Instead they contained a trio of the most pansy assortment of dogs I've ever seen.

I'm sorry. The inner me rose up demanding a voice. The inner me screamed at the top of my lungs, "They're dogs! They have four legs! Let the stupid things walk!"

With all of the strength I could muster, I reined in my inner "me."

Now I'm sitting at home in my comfy chair, a cup of home brewed coffee at my side, listening to a relaxing music video of an aquarium and breathing deeply.

I hope my clutch doesn't begin to slip until I'm at least 100.

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1/8/19 5:51 pm


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Post Cojak
I love it. You did a good job of describing at least one thing that makes my inner me laugh to keep from crying, the strollers with dogs in them. I see 'em every day. Amazing how the dogs do not need exercise.

Anyway, yes sir. I was with my BIL a retired COG preacher when he shouts hallelujah. I said "Yes Praise God, what are we shouting about?"
"See that car tag it says, "Save the children", In Florida we have saved the Turtles, Porpoise, Catfish and Specs. Now we are finally pointing to HUMANS!"

We are in a society that has raised the value of dogs and other animals above human.

Anyway, a very reasonable rant my friend. Cool Cool Cool
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1/8/19 8:42 pm


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Post Quiet Wyatt
The struggle is real, as they say. Thank God your inner you made the right decision, with the Holy Spirit in you, to resist temptation. I’m glad you gave in to the temptation to write that, though. That was funny. [Insert Acts Pun Here]
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1/9/19 1:54 am


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Post Roughrider... Aaron Scott
I thought you would have known better than to go to a coffee shoppe (notice the cute spelling!). It is YOU who are to blame, my friend. Instead of a good cup of Maxwell House or what have you, you went into a den of iniquity where they serve coffee that is in drag.

Next time, 7-11. Or Waffle House.

Don't ever let us hear of this again. It almost cost you your soul!
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1/9/19 8:03 am


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Post The Cure for You FG Minister
You need to listen to Brother Joel Osteen. He says every day can be a Friday and he can also teach you how to be a better you. I'm sure he can help. Acts-celerater
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1/9/19 8:13 am


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Post Re: Roughrider... roughridercog
Aaron Scott wrote:
I thought you would have known better than to go to a coffee shoppe (notice the cute spelling!). It is YOU who are to blame, my friend. Instead of a good cup of Maxwell House or what have you, you went into a den of iniquity where they serve coffee that is in drag.

Next time, 7-11. Or Waffle House.

Don't ever let us hear of this again. It almost cost you your soul!


Is Quick Trip acceptable?
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1/9/19 8:15 am


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Post Re: Roughrider... Cojak
roughridercog wrote:
[...


Is Quick Trip acceptable?


In Florida my son prefers WAWA! Is that stop nation wide, or just Florida, just asking. Embarassed
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1/9/19 11:57 am


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Post Went to my favorite convenience store for coffee today roughridercog
Not a peep from evil Roughrider Laughing
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1/9/19 1:08 pm


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Post Re: Roughrider... Aaron Scott
roughridercog wrote:
Aaron Scott wrote:
I thought you would have known better than to go to a coffee shoppe (notice the cute spelling!). It is YOU who are to blame, my friend. Instead of a good cup of Maxwell House or what have you, you went into a den of iniquity where they serve coffee that is in drag.

Next time, 7-11. Or Waffle House.

Don't ever let us hear of this again. It almost cost you your soul!


Is Quick Trip acceptable?


Yep. That'll do.

Now, I know you and Travis like coffee in drag--even better if there's some French ingredient that you have to say aloud. It's a shame, but it's what it is: The deterioration of Church of God masculinity into a blend of femininity and wanting to have women ordained!

I just don't know about y'all. I think the only way forward is for us men to tell our wives to "leave the driving to me."

(SMILE)
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1/9/19 8:10 pm


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Post Dave Dorsey
There are lots of people in the world who would say you guys aren't men because you don't drink lots of alcohol. That opinion is about as silly as the coffee gatekeeping going on in this thread.

Criticizing pets in baby strollers is legit, though.
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1/9/19 8:20 pm


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Post diakoneo
Dave Dorsey wrote:


Criticizing pets in baby strollers is legit, though.


Indeed...

But real men drink coffee not fru fru latte induced coffees with sweeteners, foams and flavors etc.etc. Razz Twisted Evil
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1/9/19 10:13 pm


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Post Dave Dorsey
Real men enlist and then deploy overseas as a part of OEF, OIF, or OIR. When one is enjoying a good mock of millienials, it is worth remembering that the overwhelming majority of KIAs and WIAs in those conflicts have been millennials. [Insert Acts Pun Here]
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1/9/19 10:17 pm


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Post Dave Dorsey
I realize this thread is mostly in jest, so hopefully no one will take this reply too seriously either. But "real man" gatekeeping has always struck me as odd. It reminds me of someone I know who used to brag that he never buys tampons for his wife at the grocery store. Like, making your wife go out while she's on her period doesn't make you a man, it just makes you a terrible husband.

Real men fear God, work hard, take responsibility, love and serve their spouses, and lovingly parent their children.

If a dude who is doing those things wants to drive his Prius to Starbucks for a caramel macchiato with whip and cinnamon, I'm not sure where anyone gets off questioning his masculinity.
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1/10/19 7:24 am


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Post A serious question about dogs in baby strollers Preacher777
What is the reasoning for putting a dog in a baby stroller versus letting the dog walk? The only thing I can think of is not having dirty feet coming back into the house. Is this why people are going this route or are there other reasons? Friendly Face
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1/10/19 9:42 am


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Post JLarry
My inner man screamed this morning when I read a governor's wife said she wants to be known as "the first partner" in order not to offend the GLBT's.

Never mind the other 99% of us.

Hell is rejoicing.
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1/10/19 10:11 am


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Post Re: A serious question about dogs in baby strollers Dave Dorsey
Preacher777 wrote:
What is the reasoning for putting a dog in a baby stroller versus letting the dog walk? The only thing I can think of is not having dirty feet coming back into the house. Is this why people are going this route or are there other reasons?

Maybe a designer species that doesn't like a lot of exercise? I have no idea. That one's really odd to me.
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Post Call me a bad husband, but... roughridercog
I simply refuse to stand and hold my wife's purse while she shops.

Nope, nope, nope.


I do the manly thing.


I have her put it in the shopping cart and I will guard it with my hand on the butt of my pistol.
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1/10/19 1:09 pm


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Post Call me a bad husband, but... roughridercog
I simply refuse to stand and hold my wife's purse while she shops.

Nope, nope, nope.


I do the manly thing.


I have her put it in the shopping cart and I will guard it with my hand on the butt of my pistol.
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Post Re: Call me a bad husband, but... Dave Dorsey
roughridercog wrote:
I have her put it in the shopping cart and I will guard it with my hand on the butt of my pistol.

That's legit.
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1/10/19 1:14 pm


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Post Re: Call me a bad husband, but... roughridercog
Dave Dorsey wrote:
roughridercog wrote:
I have her put it in the shopping cart and I will guard it with my hand on the butt of my pistol.

That's legit.


Good. I didn't want to lose my man card.
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