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INCREDIBLE, MASSIVE, HUMONGOUS PET PEEVE!!! (Just like always)

 
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Post INCREDIBLE, MASSIVE, HUMONGOUS PET PEEVE!!! (Just like always) Aaron Scott
OK, I may have mentioned this before, I don't know, but if so, it still bears repeating....

You ask someone to, oh, I don't know, receive the offering, or testify, or maybe even sing a song, and they look at the microphone in ABJECT HORROR!!!!

They confidently say, "Oh, I don't need that," apparently thinking that everyone has a Bluetooth connection to their voice. Or that their voice has the power to move mountains just by volume alone.

Then, after rejecting the mic, they commence to speak as if whispering confidentially in your ear. Thus, everyone more than a couple of yards away hears something that sounds like: "mmmm...wewewewe...mmmm...wewewe." It SOUNDS like words, but no one can be sure.

When they sit down, everyone says "Amen." NOT because they are amening what was said, but because they are giving God glory that the moron finally sat down!

It doesn't matter if it's a small church or one that seats 5000, they will look at the mic as some strange object, possibly of Satan, then avoid it. Of course, no one is blessed by what they say or sing. But that's not just because they can't hear them...it's because ANYONE THAT PITIFUL CAN'T POSSIBLY BE USED BY GOD!

(OK, I made that last part up, but ONLY THAT!)

As far as I'm concerned, when the Bible speaks of who will have their part in the Lake of Fire (e.g., "all liars..."), I am only too happy to nominate a new addition to the list: Those who were given the opportunity to use a mic, but can't figure out how to use the thing! "What? Do I just hold it at arm's length? Do I just have to think what I want it to say...or can it read my mind?"

We cannot afford to let these folks in heaven--they will mess it up for sure.

OK, now I feel better.
Hon. Dr. in Acts-celeratology
Posts: 6027
12/14/17 5:30 pm


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Post FLRon
I’ve noticed the opposite effect in our church Aaron. Asking one of the brothers to pray over the offering I’ve heard mini sermons, prayers for everybody’s uncle, and even had one dear brother break into a song.No mic fear at my church, that’s for sure!

Maybe you’ve intimidated them to the point they’re terrified of the mic? Either that, or you’ve set the bar so high no one wants to embarrass themselves cause they can’t measure up? Very Happy
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“Hell will be filled with people that didn’t cuss, didn’t drink, and may even have been baptized. Why? Because none of those things makes someone a Christian.”
Voddie Baucham
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12/14/17 10:32 pm


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Post Aaron Scott
FLRon wrote:
I’ve noticed the opposite effect in our church Aaron. Asking one of the brothers to pray over the offering I’ve heard mini sermons, prayers for everybody’s uncle, and even had one dear brother break into a song.No mic fear at my church, that’s for sure!

Maybe you’ve intimidated them to the point they’re terrified of the mic? Either that, or you’ve set the bar so high no one wants to embarrass themselves cause they can’t measure up? Very Happy


Well, I can assure you that the problem is not the latter! (SMILE)
Hon. Dr. in Acts-celeratology
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12/15/17 11:41 am


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