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Kevin Wallace: A letter from your Church Family!

Acts Enthusiast Posts: 1274 **3/27/17 7:50 am**

A letter from your Church Family
(Church of God)
Family as defined by Webster’s dictionary:
1. 1: a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head : HOUSEHOLD
2. 2a : a group of persons of common ancestry : CLANb : a people or group of peoples regarded as deriving from a common stock : RACE
3. 3a : a group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation : FELLOWSHIPb : the staff of a high official (as the President)

I have been wanting to write this for quite a while now, and considering the recent departure of Kevin Wallace from the Church of God and the responses we heard for and against his departure, I feel that now is the best time to do so.
I was raised in the Church of God, and to be quite honest, it’s the only church I know. I was the child running around during service, breaking things, getting into trouble, being forced to sing on Thursday nights, and I was the was the child who was saved at every youth camp. As I grew older, I became a Sunday school teacher, a youth leader, a youth pastor, and the District Youth Pastor. It has been within the last ten years that I have become a Church Planter, a Pastor, and the District Overseer for the Northern Kentucky Metropolitan District. I also served the Kentucky USA Missions board as chairman, and I sit on the examining board for ministerial licensure in the state of Kentucky. Serving in these capacities has allowed me to see a lot of the good in the church, and unfortunately, some of the bad.
We are a church full of broken people. People who have made mistakes in life, people who are searching, people who are missing something (parents, acceptance, forgiveness, community, commonality, love), people who are looking to be part of something greater than themselves … they (as well as ourselves) find our way into a Church that is filled with people just like us. Very broken, very confused, and very lost. When people are put together, their personal issues can come out, and it will cause some problems.
What problems are caused? Disagreements, fights, hurt feelings, and competition. All the things we hate about the “outside” world come into our world creating our own dysfunctional family. Even though the family is dysfunctional at times, we still want to be a part of it because, deep down, we need it.
This family, with all its craziness, still provides us with the things we may think we are missing or are missing (parents, acceptance, forgiveness, community, commonality, love). Even though this family is imperfect, we still desire to be part of it. We may get mad at our current church family so, we move on to find another church family. Sometimes we find the “right” family, other times we have go back to the one we left, and sometimes we never find what we are looking for.
Through all the dysfunction something happens, a family type atmosphere is created. You become part of the family. Somebody is looking for you, somebody is pouring into you, somebody is caring for you, somebody loves you, and somebody wants to see you grow into something great…. A bond is created. Kind of like a parent raising their children.
I have 3 children: my wife and I, through love, conceived our children. We watched them as they were brought into this world, we watched them take their first bite of food, take their first steps, enter school for the first time, pass or fail their first test, get into their first fight, participate in their first sport, find their first date, graduate from High school, and head off to college. All of this is great but for the parents and family, it’s difficult to let them leave the home.
It’s difficult because we have been responsible for them for so long. We have wiped their butts, taken care of their wounds, stood by them through tough times and stood up for them when they were being done wrong. When it’s time for them to go, we often times have the tendency to rebel against it. Why? Because they are ours. We poured into them, invested into them, and lost many nights of sleep over them. We want to keep them, they are ours, we have something in common, and they are our family.
I have heard all the negative stuff about Kevin Wallace and the others who have left the Church of God. Believe me, I understand the frustration that he feels, and the mean words he has heard. I too dealt with the same thing when I left my home church to plant my own. Your family, for some reason, becomes angry, hateful, spiteful, and distant. This is confusing because you are wondering why they do not just accept what you are doing as the right thing.
The reason they are this way, is because they are grieving. They have lost a family member. Sure, you may only be going to the next town over or to a similar denomination, but they will no longer be there when you fall, when you need protection, or need something…now they must let you do things on your own, and it’s scary for them. Maybe through their reactions toward you, they are wondering if they did a good enough job in helping you, and are worried that you won’t need them anymore. That’s a scary thought for a parent, to think their child does not need them anymore.
Time will heal this wound. Time will prove or disprove to the family if the move the child made was the right one. Regardless if it was right or wrong decision, the family bond is still there, and once the pain of the separation has faded away, the family will see that they still have something in common. If it’s a church family, they will find they still have Jesus in common.
So, what is this preacher saying? If you have left a church and received negative or mixed reactions because of your move, try not to get offended. This dysfunctional family is saying they love you and don’t want you to leave.
As a Pastor, I have had to deal with people leaving our church. I have learned to put on a happy face and to accept it even though deep down, it’s killing me. When my oldest son Wayne reached the age of 18, I had a secret battle inside because now he is an adult and if he wants to leave home, I can’t stop him. I want him to stay where I can protect him and influence him but I know the day is coming when he will take that step, and believe me my heart hurts when I think about that.
That’s how a church family operates. As dysfunctional as we may be at times, we love you, we want to care for you, we want to watch you grow, and we want to watch you be successful, but we don’t want to watch you leave.
If you have been offended by a church family, let me be the first to say – we are truly sorry that we have hurt you. We are sorry that our words were not supportive and encouraging – we were just having difficulty coming to grips with the idea of losing someone we love. We are sorry and beg for your forgiveness.

Very truly yours,
Your family!

Charles Page

Friendly Face Posts: 346 **3/27/17 11:22 am**

I hope Kevin reads this!
_________________
Sanctification is subsequent to the new birth

bradfreeman

Acts-dicted Posts: 9027 **3/28/17 7:00 am**

This is a heartfelt letter. If his move is based on hurt, I hope this helps heal.

But I don't think KW has left the church, the ministry or the family of God.
_________________
I'm not saved because I'm good. I'm saved because He's good!

My website: www.bradfreeman.com
My blog: http://bradcfreeman.tumblr.com/

wayne

regardles

Acts Enthusiast Posts: 1274 **3/28/17 8:02 am**

Hey Brad,
Regardless why he left, I want him to know why we react the way we do. I have been guilty of acting this way and have had the behaviors acted out towards me, from my family and dearest of friends.
Kevin Wallace is a great man and I am sure he will be successful. The CoG is a great Family and we will be successful as well.

spartanfan

Re: regardles

Golf Cart Mafia Underboss Posts: 3638 **3/28/17 8:15 am**