Actscelerate.com

Ernie Long

What do you do if you have no youth in your church?

Acts Enthusiast Posts: 1050 **5/24/16 7:31 am**

I didn't want to hijack Marty Baker's thread to ask this question.

I believe there is an assumption that every church has young people or young adults attending and active in every church and if you don't then it's the pastors fault along with everything else that is problematic in the church.

I'm sure I'm not in this boat alone, for the most part, the age range in my church is late 40's to early 90's.

The youngest person in my church is my 30 yr old son. I do have grandparents that will bring their grandchildren when they are allowed to bring them and I feel sorry for my son. He is heading up our children's church and doing a great job with it. This is the first year this church has had ever had kids go to camp. But, he only has kids every few weeks. One week he will have one and the next week he'll have seven, and then the next few weeks he doesn't have any.

I have a couple who is in their 90's as my greeters, women in their late 40's as nursery workers, a couple who are in their 60's teaching on Wednesday night, another couple who is in their 60's as event planners, and another couple in their 50's doing a Help's ministry.

The age range of our praise team is 40 - 60 years old.

All of these people love the Lord and people, but when a young couple or a young person visits, all they focus on is the gray hair and not the people themselves.

When I contact visitors, I hear the same from all of them, "I/we enjoyed the service and I/we felt the presence of the Lord and I/we have not experienced that in a long time and I/we will be back..." for some I have been waiting over three years. I will see them in local stores and they tell me, "we have go to get back to church and we'll see you soon..." But it's like if you're the only young person or couple in the church, then there must something wrong with the church and no one wants to be part of a church with problems.

These people STILL have a lot to offer, but as it has always been, after your 40th birthday, it's time for you to get out of the way and let the younger people do what you use to.

Please, don't read into this for anymore than what it is. My church is truly a loving and friendly church, we just don't have any people younger than my 30 year old son.

I am sincerely asking, "What do you do if you have no youth in your church?"

shaunbwilson

Site Admin Posts: 3222 **5/24/16 8:49 am**

What age range are you considering to be the missing young people? You mention your son heads up the Children's Church, so there seem to be some kids at the church. What's the specific age range that's missing?
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Clint Wills

Leverage your son...

Hon. Dr. in Acts-celeratology Posts: 5161 **5/24/16 9:07 am**

OK...that probably sounds really horrible, but allow me to explain. almost 16 years ago my dad became the lead pastor of a church of 20 (on Easter). The youngest people there before we arrived were getting close to retiring. At the time I was 21 and my sister was 19. So we decided to move with them. She and I got involved with people our age. I went to work and college and she went to college. His first Sunday was in August and by the following March we had a [relatively] thriving group of young adults. In that time the church grew to nearly 40 and if memory serves me correctly, 100% of that growth was under 40...and a lot under 30.
I'd also say that the lack probably isn't in teenagers as much as it may be in parents of teenagers. I think attracting the first few parents may be the hardest thing for a church. Even has a minister, I'd have to know that I was hearing God before I ever took my kids to a church without an excellent children's ministry. That's nothing against you - it's just a tough spot!
As the 30-40 age group grows, so will the younger ages. Maybe try tackling the age group that you are best equipped to tackle - in light of the desire to grow younger. Let's face it - you're best equipped to attract senior citizens, but that's not where you're wanting to go. So you'll have to stretch, but try making the stretch small at first.

Brandon Bohannon

Acts-celerater Posts: 571 **5/24/16 9:56 am**

Energize what you have first. "What is in your hand?"

There was a Baptist Church a few blocks from the high school I attended. They were an older congregation in an older building but they had an idea, got energized and made the idea happen. It was simple.

Every Friday, from 11am to 1pm, they served lunch for $1. We had open campus and about 1400 students 10th thru 12th grade. Most weeks we ate lunch off of $20 and by Friday we were broke. When we learned that these "old people" were serving lunch for a dollar, every Friday we would fill their building up! Most of the time it was hot dogs, frito pie or nachos but it was lunch and they treated us well. They were always smiling and for the boys, mostly high school athletes, they would serve a little extra food or give a second helping. They captured and modeled the power of "serve".

That one idea may not help you where you live but I appreciate your heart and pray that this sparks what you are looking for. We can't put new wine into old wineskins but we can energize/spark/speak life and purpose into the "driest of bones". Lol! I'm not calling "elder" saints "dry bones" but I am saying that our situations can become and feel dry! Blessings on you as you lead and pastor!
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Cojak

01000001 01100011 01110100 01110011 Posts: 24285 **5/24/16 10:25 am**

Very good post Ernie, you are right you are not alone. We visit many churches in the same situation. And YES I believe there is an answer, I just do not know what it is.

When I was trying to pastor, and thought I was a preacher, I honestly tried the myriad of ideas sent out by HQ. Nothing worked at the first two churches that mirrored your Post. The third was a plant and it did work and the church actually grew, I CANNOT tell you why. I was doing the same things I had done other places, but the AREA was different.

Looking back if there was a silver bullet, or a one size fits all every church would be a mega church..... Embarassed

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Clint Wills

Hon. Dr. in Acts-celeratology Posts: 5161 **5/24/16 12:02 pm**

Brandon Bohannon

Re: Leverage your son...

Acts-celerater Posts: 571 **5/24/16 3:30 pm**

Link

Acts-perienced Poster Posts: 11849 **5/24/16 9:25 pm**

I haven't written up the book yet. I have an idea for a Christian sex education book that takes kids through just about everything the Bible says about sex. It can also cover marriage, divorce, dating, and related topics.

So let's say you have some materials like that and people in your church ready to teach on it. Then you run some ads, put up a sign, maybe knock on some doors or stand at the strip mall and give out fliers. You advertise that kids learn the biology of sex at school, but not the morality of sex. That your program will teach children:

- how not to catch an STD
- how not to get pregnant out of wedlock
- how to choose a suitable partner for a healthy marriage at the appropriate time
- how to avoid divorce later in life

and whatever else you are teaching. To the kids, advertise that they get to come learn about sex. Then launch it. Separate boys from girls. Work evangelism into the program, especially as you present sins, you can talk about forgiveness through Christ. Win some young souls to Christ. Maybe you can develop a ministry to bus the kids in. Then minister to their parents.

When I was in Hawaii, there was a program in schools that gave kids the impression that anal, oral, and vaginal sex was all the same and was okay. It didn't directly state that, but that seemed to be the gist. It was related to some of the evil work of the Southern Poverty Law Center. Someone from a church could point to what was taught in school and tell parents that children needed some education in sexual morality.

I suspect even unbelieving moms and dads worry that their daughters might get pregnant or that their boys might get a girl pregnant, and that their kids might get HIV. And, even with all the information at their fingertips on their cell phones, some kids might still want to go some place where they could learn about sex, maybe even dropping some anonymous questions in a bowl.

The ones that don't get saved in the program might still learn something that will save their lives or keep them out of some trouble later on.

That's one idea. Another is a lighted sign 'Teen ministry on the 29th at 7 PM. Free pizza.' If you do get teens to come, you might get some parents joining through them. I've read that some missions research shows a higher rate of winning men to the Lord through their children converting than through their wives converting. The highest rate of family conversion came through winning the father. I'm not sure the cultural contexts.
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Ernie Long

Not making excuses, just stating current facts

Acts Enthusiast Posts: 1050 **5/25/16 9:41 am**

First, we have grand-kids who are brought by the grandparents. Their ages range from 1 to 12 years old. On most Sundays, the nursery has 1-2 infants/toddlers. In CC we have ages ranging from 5-12. As I stated in my original post, these kids are hit and miss kids, mostly miss. The grandparents try, but their hands are tied as far as their kids allowing the grandkids to go to church.

As far as the age group that is missing in our church, they are the teens to the middle aged. I have a couple who are in their 40's... both are 49.

As I said, the people here are loving and friendly... but (it seems there is always a but) we are a comfortable church in that people don't want to do anything to reach others outside of our church.

The previous pastor (who post on here at times) told me before I came here that the people will let me do anything I want to do. Which is true, they have no problem of me and my family working like crazy in the church, but just don't ask anyone for their help.

As far as the other ideas that were given (other than the shuffleboard idea) I appreciate and will see if some can be done.

wayne

Re: Not making excuses, just stating current facts

Acts Enthusiast Posts: 1274 **5/25/16 9:58 am**

Clint Wills

Re: Not making excuses, just stating current facts

Hon. Dr. in Acts-celeratology Posts: 5161 **5/25/16 10:11 am**

Old Time Country Preacher

Acts-pert Poster Posts: 15570 **5/25/16 10:48 am**

bonnie knox

[Insert Acts Pun Here] Posts: 14803 **5/25/16 10:56 am**

Ole Timer, you're right to call out Brandon, but I think ya ort to think twice before ya take ya brother to court like at.

Brandon Bohannon

Acts-celerater Posts: 571 **5/25/16 11:52 am**

Old Time Country Preacher

Acts-pert Poster Posts: 15570 **5/25/16 3:52 pm**

Brandon Bohannon

Acts-celerater Posts: 571 **5/25/16 4:26 pm**